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advice please
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:17 pm
by mosaik
last night i broke up with my girlfriend. It wasn't working out.
I feel bad though because i feel like i led her on for three months and sort of wasted her time. i should have known that it was never going to go anywhere and i should have told her. she's pretty upset, and i can't help but thinking that it isn't fair.
i really want to do something to help her hurt less but i don't know what to do. i feel like such a bastard.
anybody got any ideas how i can make her feel better without promising to take her back?
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:22 pm
by starvingeyes
no.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:24 pm
by Susan
That's the kind of brotherly advice people love.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:25 pm
by starvingeyes
*takes a bow.*
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:26 pm
by Susan
*tosses a flower*
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:27 pm
by mosaik
i can sure count on you, chris.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:27 pm
by starvingeyes
yup.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:28 pm
by starvingeyes
i also have this to add
o, boo hoo. maybe you should write about it in your live journal.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:28 pm
by Susan
OMG THREADJACKED!
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:30 pm
by mosaik
why do i bother?
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:33 pm
by Susan
Interjection.
The best place to start would probably be with a sincere apology. Accentuate what you did wrong, what she did right, and apologize.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:34 pm
by mosaik
i apologized last night. i think that helped a little
i hope we can still be friends. it's not her fault i wans't attracted to her. it was the timing, and the shoes that she had to fill were ten sizes too big for any mortal woman.
i'm going to call her tommorow to pay her for some concert tickets she bought. maybe i can talk to her about it more then.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 12:35 pm
by Susan
Godspeed fair mortal.
Posted: 7/3/2003, 3:24 pm
by emily
Why did you go out with her if you weren't attracted to her?
Posted: 7/3/2003, 3:27 pm
by mosaik
i was.
but then some other things in my life changed and i was forced to re-evaluate my priorities.
i got "dumped" by somebody i loved, and so i need to take some time to put her behind me before i can get on with my life. julia and my relationship was an unfortunate casualty of that truth last night.
such is life, i suppose. the only thing is now i'm very confused about what to do.
Posted: 7/4/2003, 9:22 am
by Lando
The best thing you can do is: If you want her to still be a part of your life and she wants the same, and she understands that you do not want the relationship to continue is: to be friends, I know, for most people it doesn't work out, but if she cares about you and wants you to be a part of her life and you'd like her as a part of yours, then tell her the most that will ever happen is to be friends. It worked for my ex and me, we're still friends and we went out for a year and a half...
Posted: 7/4/2003, 11:27 am
by Neil
Ya know......I basically did the same thing as you bro

it finally took another girl to convince her that it was totally over........and lord behold, several days later I found out my ex was bisexual and she was sleeping w/ a girl behind my back.
She could've told me and I would've been supportive

aaaaanyways.....good luck with that though. It doesn't sound like theres a whole lot you can do to make things better other than continue to be civil and a friend if thats ok in your eyes.